Being Honest and Different

I now call myself an artist and maker. Disclaimer: This label does not mean that I support myself with my art or quilts. Nor does being an artist mean to me that the art one makes is good. Being an artist to me means trying to make images with meaning, and if I'm lucky, to others as well. I have sold a few pieces. That always makes me feel validated, but I'm not making a lot of money and that's ok. I just want to make meaning. During my teaching career there was a lot of emphasis on perception. Perception is everything I was told. I tried my best to present my best to the public and to the kids I taught. I could relate to the trials of some the most challenging home lives of my students. But I never understood why. It wasn't until I started asking questions from older family members that I learned the truth. My Dad was emotionally and physically abusive to my older brothers. I was in kindergarten when the youngest brother married and left home. I had no idea. I had a completely different experience growing up. But yes, Dad could be scary. My Dad died when I as ten years old. Soon after my Mom and I moved away from the country to a different school. I was bullied a bit. We didn't have that label then. I just shrugged it off and did my best to work on my music and from time to time some art scribbles. I did have friends so none of it was very traumatic. But I always felt I was holding back information. I had a very serious interior life but never shared this side. Like most kids, I just wanted to fit in. As a young adult with this background, choosing a spouse can be problematic. Fast forward 17 years after finding things weren't working, we split up. I wish I had understood that my early home life had started seeping through that marriage. I didn't understand those early experiences until two years ago. (I'm 58) It's a good idea to work with a good therapist. While facing the truth is tough. Hiding your life experiences is not good for anybody. I even developed asthma and throat symptoms that I associate with not telling the whole truth. Ignorance is not bliss. Brene Brown has written a good book about vulnerability. I'm doing my best through my art and quilts to speak the truth and be vulnerable. The quilt at the top of this post has symbols in Morse Code. It spells "Love Transforms." I know this is true.

Paint and Quilting

This is a sample of new work that I am excited about. I am using fabric as the underpainting, then a layer of paint, then, fabric collage, more paint, thread painting, thread sketching and polymer clay. Yes in other words, mixed-media. I am happy to work this way now. I have also solved the problem of how to depict people by using photos in the collage process. (I don't have a sample picture today but will next time.) I have a new phone with photo capabilities that I can email and so on. Finally I belong to the 21st Century. :-) I love this new process. I can change things as I go. Nothing is set in stone until the sewing stages. Oh happy day!

How to Become an Artist without an Art Degree--Chapter 1 My Story

I first became interesting in "making" about the same time I was due to have my first child. Really bad timing in a way. Everyone knows that children take precedence over almost everything, especially as babies. But I had taken my first quilting class and I was hooked. Unfortunately I was not very successful with several of my beginning attempts. The teacher had taught basics choosing seven sisters as one of the first blocks! We were also piecing by hand and oh what a mess that was! I can laugh now that I am teaching the Hunter's Star . However I have Deb Tucker's ruler for accuracy. What a difference! I have come to enjoy making quilts of all kinds however, I eventually felt the need to try other things Fast forward 15 years and I was making quilts yet not feeling the same satisfaction. I tried rug hooking, weaving, and embroidery, painting, polymer clay, and free-motion machine embroidery. I have pretty much dropped the rug hooking and am considering trading those supplies with someone for a piece of art. The weaving stuff, I'll hang on to. I just have a table loom and it doesn't take up much real estate. I have started to put together the others into mixed media art quilts. After all of these experiences the painting bug is a strong pull. I am putting paint on my mixed media quilts now, but several years ago I was brave enough to take a painting class in a college setting. I LOVED it but eventually missed sewing. The painting above was done after the painting class. As fun as it is, I just didn't continue to paint in that fashion. Instead, I've been trying to integrate both painting and sewing.

This is one of my pieces that I feel was successful. It's called "Beginning Band" These are the instruments that I taught 5th and 6th graders during my music teaching career.